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Dedicated to Emo Hoe.

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An emo kid, a Jew, a Mexican, and a black guy jump off a building, who wins? Society.

Did you hear about that new emo pizza? It cuts itself!

Drive an emo insane: Put ‘em in a round room and tell them to go cry in the corner.


Emo is to music as Terrorism is to society.

Emo’s aren’t food products.. So DONT friggin label em’

How can you tell it’s an emo guy hitting on you and not a regular dude? Instead of asking for your phone number, he asks for your poetry blog.

How do you exterminate all the emo’s? You don’t, Just wait till they cut wrong

How do you get an emo out of a tree? Cut the rope.

how many emo kids does it take to drive a car? two, one with bangs over his right eye… and another with his bangs over his left eye.

How many emo kids does it take to fix a lightbulb? One to fix it, and thousands to write a song about how the shattered pieces reflect their broken lives.


How many emo kids does it take to make a microwave burrito? Four. One to write about it on LiveJournal, One to post a MySpace bulletin, One to take a picture of himself in the mirror with the burrito, and One to microwave the burrito.

How many emo kids does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them.

How many emo kids does it take to screw in a light bulb? 3. One to replace it and two to write a poem about how they miss the old one.

How many emo kids does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. They Like To Sit In The Dark Corner And Cry.

I wish my grass was emo so it would cut itself.. (works for hair too.)

If a dumb blonde and an emo jump off a bridge, who drowns first? The dumb blonde- from the emo’s tears on the way down.

Q: What do you do if there’s an emo in your backyard with his hand blown off? A: Stop laughing and reload!

So, an emo kid walks into a bar… Then he quickly leaves to go home and write in his Livejounal about it.

Tickle Me Elmo was so last year. Now it’s… Cry With Me Emo!

What did the emo kid say to the other emo kid? Stop crying. You’re stealing all of the negative attention.

What do emo kids use as birth control? Their personalities.

What do you call 1000 emo kids at the bottom of the ocean? A good start.


What do you call an emo kid outside the mall? Anything he’ll cry no matter what you do.

What would you rather be: emo or handicapped? trick question: being emo is a handicap.

What’s the difference between emo grass and normal grass? Emo grass cuts itself.

What’s better than 50 emo kids nailed to a tree? One emo kid nailed to fifty trees.

Whats so tragic about 4 emo kids dying in a car crash? The car seated 5!

Whats the difference between an emo and and a tomato? Tomatoes don’t cut themselves.

What’s the difference between an Emo kid and a dead baby? The baby doesn’t cry.

What’s the difference between an emo kid and an onion? You cry when you cut an onion.

whats the emos favorite chocolate milk? hemoooo!

Who is the sponsor of the “National Team of Emos”? Gillette

Why did the emo kid cross the road? To get a box of tissues.

Why do emo kids always take the flight that leaves at midnight? They prefer to take the red-eye.

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